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Ten Reasons to Eat Pizza Right Now

Feeling a bit peckish? Here’s a bunch of reasons to order from us. Oven Baked provides this cozy valley with authentic Italian-style pizzas, with our own little spin on things, too. We thrive when our community does, and we truly appreciate your support, which we have received without hesitation, from day one. However, for marketing purposes, this article needs to be witty. So, here goes. Apologies in advance.

 

Support Local

Apparently funding small family-owned businesses in your area is, like, the new cool thing to do (?) Plus, it ensures your Gen Z kids’ happiness by resisting capitalist urges. And if you don’t believe us, someone on The Interweb said: “Delicious pizza, great people, fresh vibe! I love it!” Boom.

 

It’s Nutritious (Technically)

Check this out. The pizza base? Carbohydrates. Toppings like chicken, ham, and pork fillet? Protein. Cheese? That’s a lipid, baby! Honestly, how much healthier can it get? You can thank us for helping you get rid of those lockdown lbs 😉

 

Lizzo.

Hear me out on this one. Pizza can be misspelt “pizzo”, right? And pizzo sounds a little like Lizzo. And here at Oven Baked, we’re all major Lizzo fans ✊ if you pop into our shop, we’re guaranteed to have “Good as Hell” blasting through the speakers.

 

New Pizza Just Dropped!

The Rick Roll! 

 

Multifunctionality

Pizza comes in a cardboard box (hand-folded by yours truly), which has many uses, such as a miniature fort (for safety purposes), a freebie fire-starter (I would say it’s so flammable it’s dangerous, but I think we’re legally bound to not say that) or even a pretend laptop.

 

Originality

There is not a single word that rhymes with pizza (as we have recently discovered that orange rhymes with Blorenge, a mountain in Wales), which makes you unique by eating it — in other words, we totally back individuality.

 

Long-Term Effects (Part 1)

Purchasing a pizza from us will rid you of anywhere between R45 and R120, thus inciting greater work ethic at your occupation, ultimately leading you to receive a little more cash at month end 🙂

 

Scrabble-ness

The word “pizzeria” will score you 28 points in Scrabble. I think this one speaks for itself.

 

Long-Term Effects (Part 2)

When you buy a pizza from us, it increases our income; hence, your support ensures ~ vibier~ pizza toppings from us in the future, and it enables business expansion (or something like that, anyways).

 

We Kinda Rock

We’ve been baking pizzas since ’15 (in the twenty-first century, but still), and — not to boast or anything — we have 4.6 stars on Google from 130 reviews, thanks to our awesome community. Trust, it will blow your tastebuds away.

 

Aimee van der Merwe

 

To make your mind up for yourself, check out our menu here.

And once you have, give us some feedback here.

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